The mechanism that starts working the day you’re born and don’t betrays you until you’re dead. It defines what kind of person you’re going to be.
The mechanism that develop itself onto you with your growth and defines how others will be seeing you.
This post is a bit personal to me. ‘Cause it’s about The Only Woman in my life. If you’re a bit familiar with my blog, you will know her.
Today(read Oct.1), she will be celebrating her 21st birthday. I know you should never mention a girl’s age, but couldn’t resist.
I have told you about what happened between us. But I never got to tell about the kind of heart and brain she is.
A trip down the memory lane.
She was a highly pampered child. Being the only child helped her cause a bit. She loved the attention she got, wherever it was, at the school, at home, at places. I mean who wouldn’t? We all love it. But sometimes the attention changes the person you’re, luckily in her case she stayed the same old girl.
When I became friends with her, she came across as a kind hearted and modest person.
Yeah! She had a heart, and yes, it had feelings in it.
A someone who would take a bullet for a friend in need.
A someone who stays down to earth in times of applauses.
A someone who was bold enough to admit her mistakes.
A someone who always cared and defined love.
A someone if she loves you, would fight the whole world with you beside.
She was a three fold blind believer in love and all she knew was to spread it to everyone.
She was all heart. She used to think from heart. She did what her heart said. She never had a second opinion on the observations of her heart.
Her brain never intervened. It’s only business was to take care of her studies. And to be honest, the brain performed it’s function exceedingly well. She was a great learner and teacher, infact truth be told, if it weren’t for her, I would have struggled with my basics. So I owe a lot of what I am today to her.
But let get this straight, people who are all hearts always have heart breaks and she was no different. ‘Cause we live in a world where not everybody is bestowed with a heart which feels. Some hearts are made out of stone. At first, they didn’t matter much and she was handling them quite well, again, with all heart. But as time passed by, the heart couldn’t resist.
As time passed by, she realised that life is not a fairy tale and everybody is using anybody just for their own benefits and once the benefit is gone, you’re gone. There is no one out there for you. Everybody is for themselves. She happened to learn this lesson a hard way.
Time is the best teacher. So with time, the friends, for whom, she wouldn’t have mind taking a bullet, they faded one by one. She felt alone. The love she blindly trusted turned it back on her. She was betrayed by everybody, whom she once considered her heart’s tiny little parts.
Her heart was tormented. It was shattered. She didn’t know where to go. How to go. How far to go. To whom to go.
Heartbreak’s does only two things. It will either stone your heart or will leave you depress for ages.
She was all depressed. She limited her friend cycle. Made herself socially inactive. She tried hard to concentrate on her career part, but something was killing her. It’s was her heart. The soft corner of her heart, which longed for love, only to find it nowhere.
Nowhere. The place where life meets insanity. Where life devoids itself of love.
She decided to make amends with life. She made sure no important life decisions are taken from the heart and never to believe in love again, and started preferring actions over emotions.
She’s all brain now. A beauty with brain. It functions in a specific way, it is too stable to have a care in the world. Unlike heart where decisions are made out of instant feelings, the brain rationalize the thinking and comes out with a predefine conclusion to all feelings.
She might have got numbers of problems but now she don’t solve them and instead she neglects them. She has mastered the act of pretenses.
She never wanted to become this, but life left her no choice. Deep inside she wish to be the same girl again. But she fear losing her self again, fear being defeated again, fear being getting hurt again.
That’s her. A true gem lost in this filthly world of heartless.
Happy birthday Baby.
I wish she start to hear from her heart again and start to love again. She has forgotten how beautiful it is, though painful at times, it always end up being more beautiful than it could ever be.
If you’re reading this, there is something I got to tell you,
Never regret your mistakes, because your mistakes defines you, not your achievements.